remember that song about the monster mash (it was a graveyard smash!)?
so you want more details? ok.
federico had cancer on his thyroid so the best doctor in italy cut it out for him with his mum (a nurse) assisting. i went to rome during the surgery to avoid the awkwardness of hanging out with his family for 3 days without speaking the same language. unfortunately, it seems the doctor missed some and now he has to go get his neck cut open again in 2 days, just as the last scar is healed. perhaps i'll go to venice. they say that he'll be fine but it's hard not to worry, hard to stay positive sometimes.
it has been very stressful for everyone here and i haven't quite known what to say on the matter. afterall, this isn't strictly my news to be sharing with the world. but there it is. i haven't meant to be so pooey to you all, my mind has just been a bit... well... pooey itself.
and what of the horrible looming FUTURE monster? why is he always lurking ahead of us all, ready to pounce? and a scary, tentacly fellow he can seem sometimes! i guess i really miss all of you. i was thinking about going to india again straight out of italy. i think i've talked myself out of that... i was thinking about staying in italy, but then i realised that i was a lazy lazy girl who still can't speak the language beyond pleasantries and swears. i'm frustrated here and it's largely my own fault. i think i've talked myself out of that. and i guess i really miss you all.
so as it stands, i should be returning to the westcoast either at the end of april or the beginning of may, depending if it seems possible to stay with federico a bit longer before he begins work and some follow-up treatments.
and i need a house.
and a resume for getting the job that pays for the house and the food for the eating.
ummm... i know i haven't done any of those things in awhile but i seem to remember that that's how it works, right?
helpsies?
federico had cancer on his thyroid so the best doctor in italy cut it out for him with his mum (a nurse) assisting. i went to rome during the surgery to avoid the awkwardness of hanging out with his family for 3 days without speaking the same language. unfortunately, it seems the doctor missed some and now he has to go get his neck cut open again in 2 days, just as the last scar is healed. perhaps i'll go to venice. they say that he'll be fine but it's hard not to worry, hard to stay positive sometimes.
it has been very stressful for everyone here and i haven't quite known what to say on the matter. afterall, this isn't strictly my news to be sharing with the world. but there it is. i haven't meant to be so pooey to you all, my mind has just been a bit... well... pooey itself.
and what of the horrible looming FUTURE monster? why is he always lurking ahead of us all, ready to pounce? and a scary, tentacly fellow he can seem sometimes! i guess i really miss all of you. i was thinking about going to india again straight out of italy. i think i've talked myself out of that... i was thinking about staying in italy, but then i realised that i was a lazy lazy girl who still can't speak the language beyond pleasantries and swears. i'm frustrated here and it's largely my own fault. i think i've talked myself out of that. and i guess i really miss you all.
so as it stands, i should be returning to the westcoast either at the end of april or the beginning of may, depending if it seems possible to stay with federico a bit longer before he begins work and some follow-up treatments.
and i need a house.
and a resume for getting the job that pays for the house and the food for the eating.
ummm... i know i haven't done any of those things in awhile but i seem to remember that that's how it works, right?
helpsies?
posted by natalie at 1:50 PM
10 Comments:
bjork, may 23rd?
sorry, that was a terrible response to a serious post. i hope everything is ok with federico, as i'm sure it will be. and i hope all is well with you, as i'm sure it will be too.
indeed, hoping the Federico is well.
Again, anything you need on re-entry to the country. Housing, job etc. etc. are all easily found.
Oh Honey!
So sorry to hear to that all has not been well! we're all rooting for Federico.
I just wrote a long message but I really don't know what to say, so I erased it in case it was stupid. Plus we're all tipsy. And this keyboard is terrible. We want to see you badly. That's all I can say. But don't rush your decisions, or make them based upon language.
We love you.
If going to India is an escapist impulse, then please think long and hard about this decision. But if it very important to you then we will wish you well. Still you seem set on coming home and we support that. Come home to us.
hugs hugs hugs and more hugs...... And there are plenty more where that came from..... love you little missy, i do hope every goes well-
you can stay here at mine as long as you like..... and i here beadworld has a knew postion open ( ha!)
love you lots and lots and lots-
mini
Natalie,
I've given my comment a reread now that I'm fully sober and I'm pleased to find that I said nothing to embarrass myself. Still, I said nothing particularly reassuring to you, so I'll try this again.
This looming future is chasing us all but he seems particularly threatening to you because you've tried to dodge him for so long. Embrace him! Think of the future as your way of getting back to friends who love you and city full of blossoms, beauty, and welcoming community. You've seen a good chunk of the world by now and you still turn towards Victoria and BC. Doesn't that say something?
Apartment and job-hunting bites, there's no arguing that. But it seems like giving birth to me. Serious and unavoidable pain and frustration that comes to a sudden end with a great reward. In your case, the chance to put down some tentative roots after your wanders, fill your space with leafy green friends, and unearth your pretty and prized posessions.
Try not to think of coming back as the beginning of "THE FUTURE." How daunting! Call it the beginning of the next 6 months to a year. The rest will follow.
And you have all your friends behind you (who are all very excited about it!).
Tell Federico that a group of perfect strangers are thinking positive, healthy thoughts for him. (And you!)
Jenya
Natmaster - I don't know how I can follow up Jenya's note.. She says it all so what I have to say is pretty much repeat.
Personally I think we all know what we're supposed to be doing, but can't always get at it ourselves. A trick I find works is get someone to make the decision for you and then see what immediate response you feel in yourself. If you get that brief, tummy-flash that says "oh no" you know that whatever they've chosen is the way to go.
I am, of course, rooting for you to return back to us. We all miss you so very much. But if that isn't what is right at the moment you know that we will support you no matter what. Even if it is from half the world away.
All our love and support goes to Federico as well, so if positive energies help then he's getting a bunch from over here.
There's also a silly card in the mail for the both of you. I hope it gets there soon.
Oh, and thanks for the postcard! It's on the fridge, like all good postcards.
lol... tummy flash saying "no" = not the way to go.. i just re-read my post
so, vanessa's gonna be in van AND i'm helping you find an apartment. tempting tempting, ehhh?
hey now hey now- back off you she's ours!
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