inshallah
a train from gorakhpur (near nepal) to varanasi. federico woke me up in the middle of the night telling me that he couldn't breathe and was having severe chest pains. we were chugging along in the middle of nowhere surrounded by complete blackness.
we made it to varanasi and by morning federico was feeling a bit better. we went walking in the old city and, within half an hour, he was bitten by a dog. a terrifying thing, especially here where most of them are sick and rabid. we went to the hospital for a rabies shot and a chest x-ray and received the bad news that his infection had turned into pneumonia. after hassle and coughing fits, his insurance agreed to fly him to delhi where he can then fly home to italy.
the last night we spent together was diwali. we walked up the main street eating ridiculous amounts of sweets, first for diwali near the hindu shops and then for ramadan, which is ending soon, in the muslim area. we made it to the main ghat where a huge party had broken out, everyone happier than i have ever seen them in india. we then fled from firecrackers and explosions back to our guesthouse to watch fireworks from the rooftop (they lasted until 4 in the morning) and candles floating in the ganga. the smoke from the fireworks mingled with the smell of burning human flesh from the cremation ghat down below. there was a tangible sort of magic that i still don't understand but perhaps have gotten closer to in some way... a strange brew of life, death, beauty and horror blowing across the sacred waters and ancient city. it was a night to remind me why i'm here and give me the strength to keep going for one more month on my own.
on my own. federico left yesterday and it feels so strange to be alone again after 2 months together. suddenly the day feels very long. i can't go out walking at night anymore. we knew from the beginning that we'd have to go our seperate ways but i didn't expect that the time we shared would dig down so deeply into my heart. i can't really tell you what it was like but, so you know, it was a beautiful experience with a beautiful person who i hope i may one day get to see again. inshallah.
we made it to varanasi and by morning federico was feeling a bit better. we went walking in the old city and, within half an hour, he was bitten by a dog. a terrifying thing, especially here where most of them are sick and rabid. we went to the hospital for a rabies shot and a chest x-ray and received the bad news that his infection had turned into pneumonia. after hassle and coughing fits, his insurance agreed to fly him to delhi where he can then fly home to italy.
the last night we spent together was diwali. we walked up the main street eating ridiculous amounts of sweets, first for diwali near the hindu shops and then for ramadan, which is ending soon, in the muslim area. we made it to the main ghat where a huge party had broken out, everyone happier than i have ever seen them in india. we then fled from firecrackers and explosions back to our guesthouse to watch fireworks from the rooftop (they lasted until 4 in the morning) and candles floating in the ganga. the smoke from the fireworks mingled with the smell of burning human flesh from the cremation ghat down below. there was a tangible sort of magic that i still don't understand but perhaps have gotten closer to in some way... a strange brew of life, death, beauty and horror blowing across the sacred waters and ancient city. it was a night to remind me why i'm here and give me the strength to keep going for one more month on my own.
on my own. federico left yesterday and it feels so strange to be alone again after 2 months together. suddenly the day feels very long. i can't go out walking at night anymore. we knew from the beginning that we'd have to go our seperate ways but i didn't expect that the time we shared would dig down so deeply into my heart. i can't really tell you what it was like but, so you know, it was a beautiful experience with a beautiful person who i hope i may one day get to see again. inshallah.
posted by natalie at 9:58 PM
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