after finishing the avadhuta gita...
pemberton
i've been "home" for about a month now. who would have thought i would return to this funny little valley? certainly i didn't expect it. but fortune and friendship have brought me here, once again, almost as randomly as the first time i came. what astonishes me this time is my contentment, peace and general sense of well-being. from my new place, the "shack out back" of some rich people's cottage/farm/horse pasture all i can really see are mountains, trees, grazing horses and donkeys and assorted interlopers, including a mother bear with frolicking cub. there's just really something to be said for alpen glow versus street lights, chirping frogs versus ambulance sirens, and the smell of young poplar leaves unfurling in the sun. i get occasional fits of agoraphobia from the massive mountains and big sky all around, but the slowly arriving summer is coaxing me out more and more. i'm working as a baker in a lovely little place and learning breads, as i have often daydreamed about.
of course it's not all roses- nothing ever is. but i don't really feel a need to talk about those things right now. i see more and more that there needs to be a hint of dissatisfaction in life. without negativity, disappointment or frustration i would never have started on this amazing journey. i never would have looked at the world and felt there must be SOMETHING ELSE. i know that santosha (contentment) is a virtue in yoga, but it is not the same as complacency or resignation. we may all have our fate or karma or whatever it is that we are playing out in our lives, but we also have tremendous power to change, transform and reinvent ourselves. so i'm working with negativity (and positivity for that matter) and looking to where they may take me.
i have a ticket back to india in september, as i think most of you know by now. i admit that more of my mind and heart are leaning towards that than i would like. i want to be here now as much as possible... but then today i got a package of things from india from my friend gael and was glad that i was alone when i opened it... i was really funny: smelling everything, sprinkling ganga water on myself and touching the things over and over. dreams swirling around of places that i love; mahakaleshwar, the satyananda ashrams, kashi... intellectually i know that for all intents and purposes the reasons why i love india are here and everywhere just as much as they are there. and as i've said many times, one of my main goals is to be able to feel the way i feel there EVERYWHERE. but i'm still working on that, so off to india i go- haha!
of course, another gorgeous pemberton summer is a (probably) necessary, and not unwelcome interlude.
as a yogi, he is beyond union and seperation;
as a bhogi (enjoyer), he is beyond enjoyment and non-enjoyment.
thus, he wanders leisurely, leisurely,
while in his mind arises the natural bliss of the Self.
--from the avadhuta gita of dattatreya
i've been "home" for about a month now. who would have thought i would return to this funny little valley? certainly i didn't expect it. but fortune and friendship have brought me here, once again, almost as randomly as the first time i came. what astonishes me this time is my contentment, peace and general sense of well-being. from my new place, the "shack out back" of some rich people's cottage/farm/horse pasture all i can really see are mountains, trees, grazing horses and donkeys and assorted interlopers, including a mother bear with frolicking cub. there's just really something to be said for alpen glow versus street lights, chirping frogs versus ambulance sirens, and the smell of young poplar leaves unfurling in the sun. i get occasional fits of agoraphobia from the massive mountains and big sky all around, but the slowly arriving summer is coaxing me out more and more. i'm working as a baker in a lovely little place and learning breads, as i have often daydreamed about.
of course it's not all roses- nothing ever is. but i don't really feel a need to talk about those things right now. i see more and more that there needs to be a hint of dissatisfaction in life. without negativity, disappointment or frustration i would never have started on this amazing journey. i never would have looked at the world and felt there must be SOMETHING ELSE. i know that santosha (contentment) is a virtue in yoga, but it is not the same as complacency or resignation. we may all have our fate or karma or whatever it is that we are playing out in our lives, but we also have tremendous power to change, transform and reinvent ourselves. so i'm working with negativity (and positivity for that matter) and looking to where they may take me.
i have a ticket back to india in september, as i think most of you know by now. i admit that more of my mind and heart are leaning towards that than i would like. i want to be here now as much as possible... but then today i got a package of things from india from my friend gael and was glad that i was alone when i opened it... i was really funny: smelling everything, sprinkling ganga water on myself and touching the things over and over. dreams swirling around of places that i love; mahakaleshwar, the satyananda ashrams, kashi... intellectually i know that for all intents and purposes the reasons why i love india are here and everywhere just as much as they are there. and as i've said many times, one of my main goals is to be able to feel the way i feel there EVERYWHERE. but i'm still working on that, so off to india i go- haha!
of course, another gorgeous pemberton summer is a (probably) necessary, and not unwelcome interlude.
as a yogi, he is beyond union and seperation;
as a bhogi (enjoyer), he is beyond enjoyment and non-enjoyment.
thus, he wanders leisurely, leisurely,
while in his mind arises the natural bliss of the Self.
--from the avadhuta gita of dattatreya
posted by natalie at 6:03 PM
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