looking out from the shore

vancouver

i am just about to leave canada for an intended 2 years.  after all the hustle and bustle of planning, organizing, worrying, visiting, it has finally come to this moment.  a few hours before my multi-leg journey back to the subcontinent.  i will be honest and say that i'm incredibly nervous.

i am going to be joining the sannyas training currently being conducted at bihar school of yoga.  i can't really write about what that is going to be, because i'm not really sure yet.  i don't know what sannyas means, nor do i know what it will be like to dedicate 2 years to such an intense process.  of course it is not such an abrupt thing, as this seems to be a natural progression of what i have been working on for the last 5 years or so.  although i have no great expectations for myself and what i may achieve i know that i must continue my attempts to do the best with what i've been given.  i suppose it is my hope to find something else, something beyond the limitations i am currently trapped within.

i have a truly blessed life and more should flower from that than mere selfish enjoyment and transitory pleasures.  being in canada for the past month has reassured me, because i know that i am not running away from anything here.  a huge thanks to all friends and family for their support, and reminding me that i come from a very loving place. it is my hope to come back to you all in a better way, less selfishly and with more compassion and understanding.

until then, i will mostly be out of computer contact, so if you want to reach me it will have to be through the mail:

Natalie Rogers
Bihar School of Yoga
Fort
Munger, Bihar
811201
India